Wednesday, November 20, 2019

Parenting Perspective


Can I just say my kids are growing up WAY TOO FAST! My youngest is about to hit five and I don't know what to do with myself. She may act like a teenager with her larger than life personality, but shes still small so I can hold her, but she's getting so big so fast!

P.S. I tried to carry my son the other night because he fell asleep on the couch and that did not go well, because his eight year old man body is WAY TOO BIG for me to carry! Let's just say he was awake by the time we made it to his bed.  

This mom thing is a serious job.  Sure, I will always be there mom and they can come to me anytime, but the time I have to shape them is just going so quickly.  I often wonder if I'm doing it wrong.  
Parenting is the hardest thing I will ever do.  There is some irony to the hilarity of our world -  all the time and money we spend to get college degrees to be proficient in the work place, yet all we have to do to become parents is have sex, no training, no tests, just go and don't screw up these little people looking to us for life direction.  

Growing up, I always thought there would be this moment when I became an adult.  This switch that made me "adult Carrie" versus "girl Carrie."  But that moment never happened. 

Sure I've matured and grown, but I'm still Carrie.  My inner soul mirror still reflects the same person it did from elementary kid til now throughout the timeline. So feeling equip to raise little humans just doesn't seem possible, but it's the job that is in my lap and its a job that does expire.  The formative years are short and I need to make the most of them. 

I started reading Proverbs this week and I decided I didn't just want to read it, I wanted to study it.  Lately, I've been reading in my grandpa's Bible.  My uncle gave it to me when my Pappy died and even though its not my favorite translation, I feel connected to him when I read it.  What I do love about the Bible is the plethora of scriptures noted beside the verses.  So I can go on this journey to find other passages that add to the meaning.  I've also been highlighting and noting key words.  So I feel like I'm getting more out of Proverbs than ever before.  

In chapter one, Solomon, the author of the book, warns young people to listen to wisdom and pay attention to the instruction of their parents.  He warns of fools and the misdirection they may try to lead them on.  As I went through just that chapter two things struck me.

1.  My job as a parent is not just to make sure my kids get a good education and have great experiences, my job as a parent is to train my kids in Christ.  It is to help them know the dangers they might face in life and give them the tools to overcome it.  The question became, am I spending too much time on the wrong things?  

I choose to live in a humble place of always grappling with that question.  Earlier this year, I attended a conference and the idea of inoculating my children to the bad ideas they may encounter was introduced.  Too many times we try to shelter our children, when we should be letting them know what they will encounter out in the real world and why certain things don't work the way they are sold to us and why.  Kids need to know what they believe, why and how to defend it.  That right there is the most important part of my job.  

The second thing that struck me: 

2.  The person Solomon is warning growing men and women about weren't random strangers in the world but people from within their circle.  As I started reading the connected passages, it gave more detail of the fools and those who ignore wisdom.  It was a message of something like - be careful of those around you in your church or in your Christian circle who may try to lead you down the wrong path.  Sounds like of fitting since being a Christian in 2019 can mean 3 billion variations of "Christian."  

We do need to be wise about the people we look to for guidance.  Not everyone has our best interest at heart or has their compass set in the right direction.  If our aim is to honor God, then we need to know him and to use what he says as our guide.  We have to be ever watchful and know what to allow in and what to stay away from. 



Proverbs 1:7 tell us, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, but fools despise wisdom and instruction."  Fear doesn't mean horror movie type fear but reverence or honor.  (Though it might feel like the horror movie type if you are talking about your boss and unbeknownst to you, your boss comes up behind you.  That moment of discovery might make you freak out.)

Can I tell you just how reassuring it is to have that plumb line?! The truth is, I don't have to have a college degree in parenting to raise my little humans, but it does help to be connected with the Creator of it all.  

Today's post is really about realigning your life with your purpose.  Its about making sure you keep the main thing, the main thing.  We so easily get caught up in the rat race that we forget what we are supposed to be doing.  I'm not saying you don't keep doing life, I'm just saying, make sure you haven't lost your intentionality when it comes to life and parenting.  Make sure you are connected with the source, so that you have what you need to lead.

We only get eighteen years, which may seem like a long time when we get up at 3am to do a feeding or change a diaper, but trust me, we spend more of our life without our kids than with them and we need to make sure we are pointing them in the right direction.  

Happy Wednesday! 




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