Are You Listening?

In 1999 (yes I know a million years ago) I was living in London.  I was there for a semester abroad and it was a time filled with fun memories, life lessons and moments I will never forget.  In the four months I was there, I was introduced to the term stimulus overload and soon after my move, I embodied the concept.  

At first London was overwhelming.  Everything was noisy and fast-paced and different that anything I'd lived near prior.  It was shocking how quickly my body adjusted.  The overwhelming was not something I could function with everyday, so my brain just tuned it out.  For example, the constant sirens in the neighborhood I shared with a local hospital soon became something my brain no longer recognized.  

This experience has been revisited in a new way over the past five plus years as the internet has taken over our lives.  Living online is something most of us do.  Its given us a great deal of connection in places we never had before, and its allowed us convenience, that I can't imagine living without.  The internet has also introduced us all to stimulus overload.  

The amount of messages, platforms, agendas, information, studies, life happenings, current events, perspectives, opportunities to serve and give has been beyond excess.  Mentally and emotionally we can't process all of it without tuning it all out and just becoming hardened to the issues our world faces.  Its important to ask some questions and add some intentionality to the seemingly mundane of everyday internet life.  

So here is my question: 

What speaks to you? 

What defines you and what do you give value to? 

There are many things vying for a place at the table but there isn't room for it all.  Its impossible to adequately care about all of it.  

It can all be important, but it can't all be important to you.  Giving a little to a lot means nothing is getting your undivided attention.  

Take some time today to narrow the field.  If we don't find purpose even in the messages we receive it all just becomes noise.  Noise is annoying.  

So where is your passion and how can you find more of that today?  What needs to go away from your brain space so you can focus on what matters?  

Organizing our thoughts and feelings is just as important as organizing our kitchen cabinets. 

Are you missing the important stuff because you've just shut down?   When the priorities speak, are you listening? 

Take some quiet time to take inventory and really think about how this applies to you.  I know I need this for myself.  Happy Wednesday folks!!! 

Finding Your Tribe

There is something amazing when you can look back over the past few months and see God working in your life.  Have you ever experienced that?  You know, like when you have 3 conversations with people in completely different circles and they all say the same thing!  When I was in junior high I had two people in two different countries share with me the exact same scripture.  I remember thinking - I better pay attention to this!

October of last year, I attended the Organic Outreach Conference in Monterey, CA.  It was amazing and if you want to know more about it, go check out their website. 

I can tell you, I took copious notes at the conference.  I am a note taker, not just from the speakers but all the ideas their thoughts spark in my own brain.  Generating ideas is kind of my jam - following through on all the ideas, is not!  Pretty sure if I had both skills mastered, I'd be a millionaire by now. 

Anyway,  one of the many people I found quotable, was a man named Mike Brock.  He shared a sentence as a side note toward the end of a breakout session that resonated with me. 

While I don't have a direct quote, what he said went something like this:

We need to reconcile our pretentious nature, when we think "God told me...", and recognize if he told you, he told thousands of other people.  Instead of standing up and saying, "God said.." find those others God spoke to and partner with them.

I have loved the journey that those words sent me on.  I didn't start out seeking a tribe of like-minded visionaries, but it definitely opened me up to the lessons I was learning.  I've already talked about the Brené Brown quote that Lindsey Teague Moreno referenced in her book, "Getting Noticed."  I was floored when I discovered this woman (much smarter than me) with the same passion.  I started off in college looking at Social Work as a major, but quickly realized my overly sensitive heart would get swallowed alive in that field, and chose Communications instead.

I love people and discovering how they tick.  My own path as created a desire to see people find their voice and walk in freedom from the pain of their past.  This woman in her talks on shame, vulnerability, emotions and daring to live bravely as we rise strong after falling, was in sync with my mantras and personal journey. 

I'm obviously not joining Brené in her research or tagging along for her speaking engagements, but seeing that common thread being spoken from someone of her caliber has given me cause to celebrate.  Its inspired me to keep moving forward because I'm not alone.  I don't need to be any of the women who have inspired me over the last few months (and that list is growing exponentially), but I've been empowered by their stories and themes to be myself.

Its easy to feel alone and while a surge of pride can be appealing when you feel God has spoken to you, that pretentious nature doesn't foster community or even promote confidence, because if we seek to be the lone wolf in the fight for our cause we will in fact be, alone.  Who wants that life?  Okay so I realize that appeals to some people, but I am not one of them.  I want my alone time but I have no desire to be isolated in this world.  Hearing that Brené's research has revealed most people struggle with the same insecurities I have, is freeing.  As she says (and I paraphrase), we may be crazy, but no more than the next person.

I need to keep going and fighting because others need me, not because I am some superwoman. Its my responsibility to speak from my life as an encouragement to others and protect that connection with my tribe - those of you being real and putting yourself out there for the benefit of others.  Why else are we here?!  I'm glad I paid attention to what God was trying to speak into my life.

Do you need that encouragement to fight on and be you? Is God trying to get your attention?  Do you need to find those with the same voice and change the world together?   Your voice is louder when its focused and joining the song of others with same song.  Look for God's guidance, go forth and make a difference through the power of connection and numbers.

4 Things To Do Before You Speak

Recently, while driving I heard a radio DJ speak some truth that resonated with me.  I am not sure the topic they were discussing as I had just gotten back in the car, but Zach, said something to the effect that many people think that if something is true that is enough for them to speak it to others, but context and timing have a huge impact on when and how we should speak it.  I couldn’t agree more!  Speaking truth in the wrong time or with the wrong motives is in fact, wrong.  

Sometimes the best thing we can do is be quiet.  This week in my Bible reading, I was working through one of my favorite books, James.   In James, we are told to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger (James 1: 19-21).  I know more than anyone that my mouth can be my greatest asset and quickest downfall.  

We think we always have the best thing to say and we are usually dying to get it out.  We are often so quick to speak that we fail to hear the person to which we are talking and in life words aren’t the only solution resource we have to offer.  So what else can we do besides run our mouth?  Well, its pretty simple!

1. Pray - 

We aren’t God and prayer often reminds us of that.  We are called to walk by the Spirit of God but how can we do that when we are walking by the spirit of self.  Its not a part of the Holy Trinity its just a human perspective and not the only one.   Prayer connects us with people through God who knows the other person greater than we do. 

 2. Be -

In an online world, we have lost some offline tools.  The best relationships are found in human, face-to-face, contact.  Quiet is awkward but often necessary.  I recall a story by pastor and author Craig Groeschel where he went to be with a family who had lost a child.  He felt he floundered in his condolences but later found his quiet presence with them in their home was exactly what they needed.  We need to not only be still in our time with God, but also in our relationships with each other.  Just being in the presence of our family and friends without outside distractions can be a powerful force that forges the relationship and holds our souls together.

3. Touch -

I recently ran into a woman I know in public.  She happens to be someone I hold a  great affection for and unfortunately don’t see often.  As our paths crossed, she shared some new bad news she received from her doctor.  In that very public place I grabbed her and hugged her.  That hug did more for both of us than any words I could utter in that moment.  During my years in college, I heard the statistic that as humans we need 20 hugs a day to feel secure.  I don’t know if the number is accurate, but I do know the concept is true.  We need physical touch.  Touch is very powerful with friends and family.  When my friend, who is not a touchy-feely kind of person, lost his wife, he was welcoming of a hug.  It was comforting in a very tenderly hearted moment.

4. Listen - 

We learn the most by listening not by talking.  When I say listen, I mean actively receiving and processing what the other person has to say without any thought to a rebuttal.  Sometimes the best way to make headway with someone in a debate or growing a relationship is by lending a listening ear.  Whether or not you understand or agree, can you become empathic or hear the heart behind the words?  

Not only do we not need to have all the answers in every situation, we likely do not have them anyway.  Too many debates are happening on social media and they are tearing up relationships because there is no relational foundation for the weight of the words we are using.  We think we know the words to say to change someone’s mind on a hot topic or to salve the soul of someone walking a hard road, and even if we do, I suggest you first pause before you speak.  Ask yourself, “Even if this is true, is this the best time and medium in which I can say it?”   Maybe its your turn to speak truth, but taking a second to evaluate can save a lot of heartache if its not.  Remember, you have other tools at your discretion, use them!  

Listening

Today a good friend told me, "God is talking, are you listening?" For someone like myself, who talks a lot, its easy to forget to listen. Listening is an important part of communication, in fact in my study of Communications at TCU, I took a class solely on listening. The bible even tells us, be slow to speak and quick to listen (James 1:19). I guess I've got a lot of learning to do in that area. So God here I am closing my mouth and silencing my chatty thoughts and asking you to speak. I'm listening.