Before I Die

Last week, I noticed a lumps on the back of my neck and the side of my neck and you know what I thought - I'm dying.  Despite everything I know about positive thinking, the power of God, the promises in scripture and that just because MedMD says, "you are dying," doesn't make it so...

I worried about the worse case scenario!

I called the doctor and the nurse wasn't sure she could get me in, then she asked why I wanted to be seen and when I told her, she had an appointment the very next morning.  Then when I got there, the line for the copay's was so long, I ended up signing into the doctor behind five other people and sat down waiting to sit for awhile and yet, my name was called back almost immediately.  Usually, I wait in the room a bit, but my doctor came in pretty quickly after the nurse.  All of this had me completely FREAKED OUT!!!  I kept trying not to think about the "C" word and yet it was all that kept coming into my mind.

Spoiler alert: I'm not dying and I don't have cancer.  I just managed to cut the back of my head without knowing it, it got infected and that caused my lymph nodes to swell so I was given an antibiotic to deal with the infection.

In those moments between finding the lumps, deciding what to do and hearing from the doctor; I was flooded with worry, but I also got some clarity.

Truth: We don't know how long we have.  We may live til we are 102 and make it on the Today Show for our milestone birthday or we may die next week.

That, my friends, is out of our control.  I don't always get how God works, but I do trust him.  God speaks truth through the Bible, but also through my life.  He's been there through it all.  Yes, there have been times that I didn't feel him or honestly wanted to die, but I know He was always there and I have seen his guiding hand all over my life.  It still scares me to die.  I am not afraid of what awaits me, but I hate the thought of leaving my family behind and not finishing what I started.  I can trust my Savior who knows just how many days I have on this earth, but I also need to be faithful with each one He gives me.

I, like you, have a job to do.  Yes, God gives all Christians a job to do in Matthew 28:16-20, but God also created us each with different ways to share his love with others.  How we walk it out is different for each one of us.  I want to be faithful in being Carrie, the best way possible and to finish what I start.

I realized in those moments of "what if this is the end" that I want to do better at being present in the lives of those I love.  I want to make the 936 weeks from birth to graduation with my kids is the best it can be.  I want to be there for my husband.  I want to go for it in my ministry and business and finish the books that have been waiting to be finished.  I want to share my story, the hope I have and what I've learned with the world (or at least my world).

I am grateful that I don't have cancer but I'm also grateful for the clarity, that scare gave me.  Because its important to know what you would do before you die.  Do you have clarity on that? Is your life in order? May you glean from my own experience.

Health Findings, A New Addition

A little under a year ago, I had some health issues and starting researching and testing some natural remedies. This past month I was able to perform with the League of Christian Actors in the musical, Les Miserables. It was fantastic. I had a blast amidst a very busy schedule. In that time I got sick and was introduced by fellow actors to the Master Tonic. I am in the process of making it myself - it takes 2 weeks to ferment. But from what I have read, it is a great way to boost the immune system to avoid sickness and a great way to ward off sickness when it knocks on your door. So here it is:
5 Raw Ingredients of Equal Portions: Garlic, White Onion, Ginger, Horseradish, & Peppers (I used serranos) Mix together in a food processor.
Fill your container (I used Mason jars) half full with the mix from above, then fill the rest of the jar with Bragg's Apple Cider Vinegar (ACV)(Unfiltered - with the Mother). Then shake and store in a dark place for two weeks to ferment. Shake them daily. Then after 2 weeks (which will be the 17th for mine), I will then strain it. Next you take a couple of shots of it a day.
Everyone in the cast was talking about how horrible tasting this stuff is, but when I took some from a friend, I found it to be not too bad. It tasted like a marinade and wasn't too hot or bad tasting. I've been taking shots of just the ACV, and it is much better than that is straight.
I will report my thoughts on it, once I add it to my daily regimen. Anyone up to trying this with me?

Health Findings, A Celebration Sidestep

Lately, in my blog I've been talking about the various health discoveries I've come across in an effort to strengthen my immune system. My tip for the day is prayer, because I did not stick with any of my new rules for eating, BUT with good reason...


IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!

My Boy and I, he's the best gift every year!

Breakfast with a friend - had a wonderful twist on a Denver Omelet which came with hash browns. It was at Bravo Farms in Traver, and I love their Sage Cheese so they added that to my omelet.

Lunch - met with some local youth pastors for our monthly lunch meeting and enjoyed some great local Mexican food. (it has cheese :)).

Dinner - Went out with the hubby to Brewbakers and had a wonderful Cobb Salad and Garlic Fries as well as a beer (which has yeast, which I was trying to stay away from).

The big kicker: Dessert

My sweet sister, Catie, sent me a basket of goodies (a small cake, cookies, cake pops, meringue pies, and fudge), so that kind of hurts my current no processed (or low processed) sugar rule. We also had the parentals over for a chocolate cream pie. Typically, I go for the All-American Chocolate Cake from Costco, but if you know this cake - its huge! So that would have been way too much temptation for me.

I had a slice of pie, a cake pop, a bit of meringue and half a snickerdoodle. That is falling off the wagon my friends, and yet had I not been trying to find some restraint, I probably would have inhaled much more.

It was a great day and now before heading to bed, I am drinking a glass of the Bragg's ACV and water and taking all my vitamin suppliments. I will probably need to juice in the morning (carrots and spinach is what I have at the moment). Good Night and Happy Birthday to me!