From Not Enough to Full of Life

I grew up in the church and from birth until now, I've gone to at least 11 churches in my life with all the moving and adjusting, and I would say a majority of them were amazing places.  While my current church is home, my childhood church in Ohio, still is my church in a lot of ways, because I not only learned about God, but I felt safe there.  I felt accepted and loved and I trusted the people to not only know the Bible, but to live it.

Even with that love, I was the girl who went forward for prayer or to confess something every week at the end of the service.  I lived in fear of messing up and some of the dysfunctional experiences I walked, messed with my sense of self and skewed the filter that I used, to view life and even the Bible.

That skewed filter kept me thinking I was doing something wrong.

"I must have too much fear if I don't feel the love of God."  

"I must not be trusting God enough because I don't feel his peace."  

"I must be wrong because I don't fit in that Christian box I see everyone else living in." 

I was reading my Bible, going to church, and was in Christian school and some of the things I thought I was supposed to get, do or be as a Christian just weren't happening. 

I recently listened to a sermon online by Steven Furtick on trusting God's timing. In his message, he mentioned some things we believe in that simply aren't true.  At one point in his sermon he said: 

"Your mind is collecting evidence for a verdict that is no longer accurate." 

The bell went off in my head.  I am the woman I am today because of the Bible plus good counseling and a team of supportive people in my life. Here's the thing, Jesus is the answer; God's Word is the lamp unto our feet, but if we've been through some hard life and have ended up believing in lies about who we are, we aren't in the place to receive the Word of God in our lives.  Some good Christian counseling helped fix the filter that was impacted by the sinful world I was born into and I believe God walked me through it all.  The Bible and a bad filter, can make the Bible a weapon in our hands instead of the good news of the Gospel (Gospel literally means good news).  Jesus' saving us in the greatest act of love is an amazing gift.  

This simple reality is what motivated me to write the book I'm working on now entitled, "Mesearch," self-discovery might not be our ultimate pursuit in life, but it may be a necessary journey to get on the right path in seeking God.  

God is gracious to me.  He created this world and said it was good at each turn (Genesis 1) but sin also entered this world and so many of us encounter lies about our world and ourselves that cloud the ability we have to see the truth.  We are in fact doing what Steven Furtick is quoted as saying.  We have believed in a lie, maybe unknowingly, and we are collecting evidence to now support it.  

Instead we need to reach toward truth, and sometimes that takes something like Psychology to get us to the point of seeing the truth.  God created it all and that includes the minds to think and the science behind how our world (and we) operate.  Counseling is not bad, in fact, when you seek counsel from someone qualified and in line with your belief system, you are only aiding your spiritual life.    

I know we can take the self-care and self-discovery too far, but I also know denying it or assuming those around us come at life from the same place we do, is naive.   I know for years I felt unworthy of compliments and self-care.  I wasn't denying myself to serve God, I was doing so because I didn't think I mattered enough to have it.  Now, standing in a much different place, a healthier place, looking back, I see that sometimes the instruction I received in how to do life through the word of God, was limited not by God, but by the person sharing from their limited viewpoint.

When I stopped long enough to address the mess inside of me and fix the filter, then those words in scripture that once made me feel not enough, felt full of life.  Are you stuck somewhere and can't figure it out?  God is pursuing you.  He may need to touch the pain in your heart and guide you to a new filter before the fullness of life he promises can be yours.  Happy Wednesday!

Doing You Jesus' Way

If you are alive in 2019 you have heard someone say, "You Do You!"

Here's the thing, I love and hate this phrase and I have been thinking about why I love it and why it bugs me. 

So many times the religion of Christianity takes over and squashes that relational aspect.  The strict rules and "my way" attitude seem to put people into boxes in ways that they just don't fit.  You see the box of crayons smashed to bits as the beauty in those that weren't accepted as “right” are discarded. 

God made us all different ON PURPOSE.  We weren't made to look identical to those around us.  I know, I talked about that last week and I don't want to be that broken record, so I will continue with this post. 

We are meant to be us, but there is a comma after that sentence ON PURPOSE as well. 

It can be easy to get the American Dream mixed up with the Biblical calling God has given us.  They don't always match.  Of course God wants us to follow our heart, but more than that he wants us to seek him with all our heart and allow that relationship guide the path.  Sometimes God uses the crap and mess to meet us where we are and make us the best versions of ourselves that we can be. 

I love, "You Do You," because we need to embrace who were were created it to be, but I don't like it because we were made for more.  We are like that microwave on the counter, unless its plugged into some electricity it ain't doing anything.  We are the best us when we are connected to our Creator, our Savior, our King!

We were made to work within the body of Christ and that often means putting others first.  It means sacrifice and self-denial.  I do think its important to validate yourself before you hand yourself over to Jesus and allow Him to speak into your life. 

Trying to check the boxes and meet all the rules isn't going to work, because that would be our effort and it isn't our effort, but God's mercy.  We have to surrender ourselves to Jesus.  When we know we are loved and can trust him, doing so isn't scary. Life is never easy, but we weren’t created for this world.  Heaven is our home.  God has given us a mission and it involves others.  Finding the balance in knowing and accepting yourself and submitting to God’s plan for your life is key.  

Let’s face it, we don’t really want people to do them if it means causing harm to others or themselves, but we do want them to not feel pressure to be a reflection of everyone else is around them.

 The Bible may only say that God said,” It’s Good,” on creation days, but he said it about all of his creation which includes me and you singularly.  We need to accept that we were made to be us and cherish who that is. The question isn’t, “how can I fit in?” Instead it’s, “how can I serve God?” One question looks outward to compare and the other looks inward and factors in who we are.  

Maybe you are saying, “Carrie, that’s all well and great, but, how?”

First, do you know what makes you, you? Do you know how you can shine? Do you know what you add to the world? Start answering those questions.  Take some personality tests, ask your friends, look at where you find most joy.  

Second, embrace the creation.  Can you list 20 wonderful things about yourself? Do you doubt your value? Are you worried that others can discount you and cut you down to worthless? If so then it’s time to ask God to show you how he sees you.  What he sees when he says, “ it is good!”

Daily write down the beauty you see in yourself.  When you hear those negative voices begin to replace them.  Find scriptures that speak to this and write them down. Post them where you can see them and be reminded.

Third, ask God to show you how you can serve and honor him, specifically how can you walk with him.  Spend time with God.  Maybe it’s time for a daily Bible reading and quiet time in prayer.  Come to know what a relationship with God looks like, not just a religion.  The beauty happens in the time together. 

True freedom is in being who God creates us to be.  Go be free! 

The Best Job A Mom Can Have

I've been working in ministry & non-profit since (and before) college.  I love helping people and being apart of what God is doing in people's lives.  It is very rewarding despite the lack of pay and monetary benefits.  

As my life changed and I added babies to the mix, my ability to be out in the community helping beyond my hours at the church became impossible.  I felt the desire to still be in ministry, but also knew if I neglected my family to do it, I was wrong.  God is clear that my family is the priority no matter how noble my efforts with teenagers, homeless or the broken-hearted may be.  

Being a mom hasn't made me irrelevant in the body of Christ.  It hasn't benched me from the game for a few years, instead, I have found the perfect ministry opportunity as I've looked for a way to serve God and keep my priorities in tact.  You ready for my big revelation? The best job I have available to me as a Christian, ministry minded mom is PRAYER! Prayer is often overlooked but as a Christian it is your most important tool.  

Don't believe me? Read a few of these verses and see if it doesn't change your mind: 

Psalm 118:21, Psalm 66:20, Ezra 8:23, Colossians 4:2, Hebrews 5:7, James 5:15, Psalm 120:1 Psalm 116:1, Daniel 10:12, I Chronicles 5:20 and Ephesians 6:18.  

Prayer can be an intimidating word because of its simplicity, or it gets used in a way that minimizes its role in our spiritual journey. Prayer is crucial because it goes before us and prepares the path or better yet, prepares us for the path. 

“Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart.”

Colossians 4:2 NLT

 Best of all, it's the perfect job for moms because we can do it anytime, anywhere! In my journey to prayer warrior, I have discovered some ways to make my prayers as a mom more effective so I'd like to share those with you. (Note: You don't have to be a mom to apply them.)

1. Set reminders

There were some people in my life going through a hard time that really needed prayer so I set a reminder everyday at a specific time to pray for those people.  Even if I get busy, I get an alert telling me to put my mind on things above.  Might as well you my smartphone for spiritual things.

2. War Room, sort of

I was inspired by the movie, "War Room" that came out this past year, but wasn't at liberty to empty my closet in order to have one, by one, I mean a dedicated spot for prayer.  Instead, I began to fill up the inside of my cabinet doors.  

If you come to my house you may open a pantry door or kitchen cabinet and find a photo of someone I want to pray for or a notecard with a scripture I want to meditate on. I can fill my house with prayer prompts without creating a cluttered environment.   As I go about my day, I am reminded through my own busyness path to focus on the Lord.  

3. Keep Those Photo Cards

I don't send Christmas cards, but Valentines instead. I use the Christmas cards I get to make my list of Valentines, but usually those cards still find their way to the trash after the holidays.  This year, I cut out the photos instead of blessing the trash can with them and added them to my cabinet collection.  If you sent me a photo card you can be assured you've been added to my list of prayer. 

4.  Write it down

I don't always journal, but I do pray.  I decided this year, as I prayed I'd note what leadings I got from God.  Sometimes what I get is just my stomach talking about food, but when I am seeking intently, I can hear from God and write it down so I don't forget. Now I have a reminder when I need to look back on what God has said. It also forces me to have some quiet, intentional time listening to God.

5. Pray a Day

One of the results of number four, is a new relationship God prompted me to pursue with a mom ahead of me in the mommy race. Her kids are grown and now we get together to talk and pray.  I can glean from her through her experience when I just need a little help.  This last week she brought a tool that has me in awe.  It's a piece of paper with thirty-one attributes with corresponding scriptures so I can pray each day for my kids in a new area of their character.  I love it! Targeted prayer is amazing and each day of every month I can pray for what the Bible calls my kids to be.  I have found this makes good prayers for my hubby and me as well.  Today, was loving.  But in the last week I've read passages and prayed for my kids to be things like peacemakers, generous and respectful to others.  Whether you use a list like mine or make your own, assign each day a prayer target.  Maybe the first of every month is missionaries, second, politicians, etc. until thirty-one categories are covered.  Maybe you use letters and pray for people in those letter ranges instead. Regardless of your method, planning your prayers makes just as much sense as planning your finances. You cover it all!  

Prayer is powerful! It's a noble calling and God needs his children to get in the game and fight with him in this spiritual battle (Ephesians 6:12).

James 5:16b NLT

“The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.”

These years of diapers, the laundry avalanche, permissions slips and school projects can leave you lost and go by with a whirlwind, but they can count for something and it's your job to stand up and be counted.  We aren't always prepared for what's ahead but as Christians we know someone who is and He can help us, but we must stay connected despite the chaos.