"I Am Not You!"
This is something we should all repeat to ourselves on a daily basis every time we feel the nudge that says -
that woman has her act together more than me.
She looks better,
is more organized,
is better at getting her kids to school on time,
has more going for her,
is a better cook,
has more friends because she's more outgoing or
is a better person of faith than me.
The truth is: she is not you.
The need for this statement isn't just a moment of reflection in my bag of insecurities, instead its found in the consistent, repetitive comments I hear in conversations with other women, we all have that voice that reaches out of our own area of weakness and grabs hold of that one woman who has other strengths. But we aren't the women around us.
If I've said it once, I've said it a hundred times.
You get to be you!
No one else gets that honor. I often feel like a disheveled mess next too the moms I stand beside at pick up or sit next to in a mom circle at whatever meeting, Bible study or prayer group we may be at, and yet, I know there are people out there who look at me with a level of jealously that I don't get. I see all of me while others see only a portion. I can forget where I stand out and how I add when get sucked into the comparison trap. The thing is we may not often feel confident, but that doesn't mean we don't try.
I have no problem, blubbering through a first conversation with a woman I'd like to befriend, because despite any word stumbles, I know the friendship is worth it, and the potential rejection is worth knowing, she's not my people.
I do put myself out there, but its not because I always feel comfortable doing it, its because I know its worth the embarrassment I might encounter. I try new things because I like the discovery of it all. Not everything sticks and it doesn't have to. On the flipside, I don't try certain things because of fear and that is what I need to work on. You and I will inevitably have different strengths and weakness. That my friends is beautiful!
Ladies, we need to get this. Why? Because we have a generation of kids coming up who are living online. They have filters and retakes and other ways to hid or try again before they put themselves out there. If a post doesn't get the desired response, they can remove it. They don't have life teaching them that they will fail and that's okay. This is setting them up to be devastated when they are rejected, lonely and when they do in fact, fail. The rise in suicide rates is in doubt, connected to the internet world that is our reality. I'm not saying its all bad, but we have recognize where the dangers are located so we can navigate through them.
If we are able to show our kids and our friends' kids that we can step up to the plate in the face of fear, and that is okay because we are who we were made to be, then we are giving them the tools they need to do the same.
I am not someone that thinks who I am out the gate is a perfect woman, but I do think I have to own up to who I am to ever have a chance at being the best me. I have to acknowledge who God designed me to be and love what he created, and then once I see that I am not the cookie cutter person as the others I encounter, God can mold me more into his image.
That takes awkward encounters and uncomfortable moments. It means embracing the difficult for the goal on the other side.
Dare to see yourself the way your creator did when he made you and said, "It is good." Dare to embrace the way you add to the world instead of comparing how you are deficient to the women around you. Dare to model courage and vulnerability in the way you face relationships and life. Dare to live outside your comfort zone in order to have the best life possible.
Still don't think you can do that one thing? Guess what, we may not have the strength in ourselves, but if we have God, he gives us what we need to step up and step out! Go read these verses and be encouraged!
So Let's Do This!
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